I'm curious George

Are you really so busy living your Hollywood life that you don't even have 5 minutes to respond to our simple request? Or, rather, have one of your many assistants respond on your behalf? Would it really have put you out to let us know one way or the other if we would be able to use your Lake Como property for Neil and Maya's wedding next year?

Unfortunately, just like you, we are busy too and we just don't have time to wait for your reply any longer. We have to get on and make alternative arrangements. We can't jeopardise the planning of the whole event just because you don't have the courtesy to pick up the phone and ask one of your people to let our people know whether you plan to be in residence at this, one of your many beautiful properties, during the month of June 2008. Dude - It's 9 months away! How much advance notice do you need? We even gave you quite a few additional days beyond the October 5th deadline thinking that you might be waiting to pull together some of the requisite documentation - a rental agreement, perhaps or some standard terms and conditions, the clean-up checklist, etc. - and knowing that you might need a little extra time to get things in order before confirming its availability with us. But no - utter silence.

So, while you continue to enjoy all the trappings of being an A-List star and seemingly forgetting all those of us that have followed your career right from that small office manager part you played in Roseanne before going on to enjoy greater things on ER and your subsequent movie success (with the exception of Batman and Robin) we will just have to put plan B into action and make the best of it that we can. It's a shame George. A real shame.

By the way, do you have Brad Pitt's cell phone number? We hear he has a property in Sicily...